StumbleUpon | laughingheart's blog posts

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/28859649/

Wed, 31 Dec 2008 05:42:15 -0800

Happy New Year. Stay Safe and God Bless You. I hope you have a good 2009. Don't drink and drive.

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/27497981/

Sat, 15 Nov 2008 02:41:18 -0800

DEATH

While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the
intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his
5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper
burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting,
then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.

The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous
dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory
be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.' (I want
this line used at my funeral!)

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/25459443/

Tue, 16 Sep 2008 01:57:06 -0700

Check out this site and it will give you a peek about what some of the damage looked like.

http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2008/09/the_short_but_eventful_life_of.html

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/25304446/

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 10:51:14 -0700

I would please appreciate everyone to pray for everyone that lives along the Gulf Coast of Mexico. My whole family lives there. And the last I heard Ike is heading right where my family lives. Parents, 4 sister, 3brother in laws, 6 nieces, 3 nephews, 1 brother, 1 sister in law and the rest of my family is here in Finland. I do plan on visiting around oct. or Nov. Oh yes, My daughter, son in law, and grand daughter live there too.

I want to pray for all the Gulf Coast familys and their safties. God Bless All you and be sure to pray for each and every one of us.

Thank you to those who do say a prayer or 2. I know prayers will go a long way. God is there for us. Let's ask and see the miricles happen.

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/22691753/

Sat, 21 Jun 2008 01:58:34 -0700

To all my stumbler Friends. Just wanted to let you know I am out of the hospital after being in there a couple of months. I am doing better. Thanks for all the prayers.

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/19035014/

Sat, 22 Mar 2008 00:59:06 -0700

I was barely sitting down on the toilet when I heard a voice from the other stall saying:
"Hi, how are you?"

I'm not the type to start a conversation in the restroom. I don't know what got into me, but I answered, somewhat embarrassed,
"Doin' just fine!"

And the other person says:
"So what are you up to?"

What kind of question is that? At that point, I'm thinking this is too bizarre so I say:
"Uhhh, I'm like you, just sitting here."

At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question:
"Can I come over?"

Ok, this question is just too weird for me. I figured I could politely end the conversation. I say:
"No........I'm a little busy right now!!!"

Then I hear the person say, nervously:
"Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!!"

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/18926060/

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 22:46:00 -0700

ORIGIONAL VERSION-

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

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MODERN VERSION-

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green." Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

Nancy Pelosi, John Kerry & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer! The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood!

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2008!!!!!!!!

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/18686901/

Wed, 12 Mar 2008 00:24:58 -0700

Moses

This is cute no matter what your political views are.

Recently, while going through an airport during one of his many trips, President Bush encountered a man with long gray hair and beard, wearing a white robe and sandals, holding a staff. President Bush went up to the man and said, "Has anyone told you that you look like Moses?" The man didn't answer. He just kept staring straight ahead.

The president said, "Moses!" in a loud voice. The man just stared ahead, never acknowledging the president.

The president pulled a Secret Service agent aside and, pointing to the robed man, asked him, "Am I crazy or does that man not look like Moses to you The Secret Service agent looked at the man and agreed.

"Well," said the president, "every time I say his name, he ignores me and stares straight ahead, refusing to speak. Watch!" Again the president yelled, "Moses!" and again the man ignored him.

The Secret Service agent went up to the man in the white robe and whispered, "You look just like Moses. Are you Moses?"

The man leaned over and whispered back, "Shhhh! Yes, I am Moses. The last time I talked to a bush, I spent 40 years wandering in the desert and ended up leading my people to the only spot in the entire Middle East with no oil."

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/17770366/

Thu, 21 Feb 2008 23:09:30 -0800

Oh yes, my friends! I am out of the hospital again! Praise God!

http://laughingheart.stumbleupon.com/review/17770335/

Thu, 21 Feb 2008 23:08:28 -0800

Good Tips

Peel a banana from the bottom and you won't have to pick the little
"stringy things" off of it. That's how the primates do it.

Take your bananas apart when you get home from the store. If you leave
them connected at the stem, they ripen faster.

Store your opened chunks of cheese in aluminum foil. It will stay fresh
much longer and not mold!

Peppers with 3 bumps on the bottom are sweeter and better for eating.
Peppers with 4 bumps on the bottom are firmer and better for cooking.

Add a teaspoon of water when frying ground beef. It will help pull the
grease away from the meat while cooking.

To really make scrambled eggs or omelets rich add a couple of spoonfuls of sour cream, cream cheese, or heavy cream in and then beat them up.

For a cool brownie treat, make brownies as directed. Melt Andes mints in double broiler and pour over warm brownies. Let set for a wonderful minty frosting.

Add garlic immediately to a recipe if you want a light taste of garlic and at the end of the recipe if your want a stronger taste of garlic.

Leftover snickers bars from Halloween make a delicious dessert. Simple chop them up with the food chopper. Peel, core and slice a few apples. Place them in a baking dish and sprinkle the chopped candy bars over the apples. Bake at 350 for 15 minutes!!! Serve alone or with vanilla ice cream.

1. Reheat Pizza
Heat up leftover pizza in a nonstick skillet on top of the stove, set
heat to med-low and heat till warm. This keeps the crust crispy. No soggy micro pizza. I saw this on the cooking channel and it really works.

2. Easy Deviled Eggs
Put cooked egg yolks in a zip lock bag. Seal, mash till they are all
broken up. Add remainder of ingredients, reseal, keep mashing it up
mixing thoroughly, cut the tip of the baggy, squeeze mixture into egg.
Just throw bag away when done easy clean up.

3. Expanding Frosting
When you buy a container of cake frosting from the store, whip it with
your mixer for a few minutes. You can double it in size. You get to frost more cake/cupcakes with the same amount. You also eat less sugar and calories per serving.

4. Reheating refrigerated bread
To warm biscuits, pancakes, or muffins that were refrigerated, place
them in a microwave with a cup of water. The increased moisture will
keep the food moist and help it reheat faster.

5. Newspaper keeps weeds away
Start putting in your plants, work the nutrients in your soil. Put wet
newspapers in layers around the plants, overlapping as you go, cover with
mulch and forget about weeds . Weeds will get through some gardening
plastic they will not get through wet newspapers.

6. Broken Glass
Use a wet cotton ball or Q-tip to pick up the small shards of glass you
can't see easily.

7. No More Mosquitoes
Place a dryer sheet in your pocket. It will keep the mosquitoes away.

8. Squirrel Away!
To keep squirrels from eating your plants sprinkle your plants with
cayenne pepper. The cayenne pepper doesn't hurt the plant and the
squirrels won't come near it.

9. Flexible vacuum
To get something out of a heat register or under the fridge add an empty paper towel roll or empty gift wrap roll to your vacuum. It can be bent or flattened to get in narrow openings.

10. Reducing Static Cling
Pin a small safety pin to the seam of your slip and you will not have a clingy skirt or dress. Same thing works with slacks that cling when
wearing panty hose. Place pin in seam of slacks and -- at DA! - - static is gone.

11. Measuring Cups
Before you pour sticky substances into a measuring cup, fill with hot water. Dump out the hot water, but don't dry cup. Next, add your ingredient, such as peanut butter, and watch how easily it comes right
out.

12. Foggy Windshield?
Hate foggy windshields? Buy a chalkboard eraser and keep it in the
glove box of your car. When the windows fog, rub with the eraser! Works better than a cloth!

13. Reopening envelope
If you seal an envelope and then realize you forgot to include
something inside, just place your sealed