StumbleUpon | helderdarocha's blog posts

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/13251650/

Sun, 07 Oct 2007 12:20:26 -0700

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/9360804/

Tue, 24 Apr 2007 09:10:28 -0700

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/7181439/

Fri, 29 Dec 2006 07:15:42 -0800

Monica...

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/7111911/

Sun, 24 Dec 2006 06:52:21 -0800

Love, the wicked game from Closer (Act One, scene 6), by Patrick Marber (published by Methuen Drama)

Dan This will hurt.
I've been with Anna.
I'm in love with her. We've been seeing each other for a year.

Silence.

Alice gets up and slowly exits.

(...)

Alice I'm going.

Dan I'm sorry. (...)

Alice Is it because she's clever?

Dan No, it's because... she doesn't need me.

Pause

(...)

Alice How...? How can you do this to someone?

Silence

Dan I don't know.

Alice Not good enough, I'm going.

Dan It's late, it's not safe out there.

Alice And it's safe in here?

Dan What about your things?

Alice I don't need 'things'.

Dan Where will you go?

Alice I'll disappear.

(...)

Alice Change your mind.
Please change your mind.
Can I still see you?
Dan... can I still see you?
Answer me!

Dan I can't see you. If I see you I'll never leave you.

Beat.

Alice What will you do if I find someone else?

Dan Be jealous.

Beat.

Alice Do you still fancy me?

Dan Of course.

Alice shakes her head.

Alice You're lying. I've been `you'.

She starts to cry.

Hold me?

Dan holds her.

Alice I amuse you but I bore you.

Dan No. No.

Alice Did you love me?

Dan I'll always love you. You changed my life. I hate hurting you.

Alice So why are you?

Dan Because... I'm selfish and I think I'll be happier with her.

Alice You won't, you'll miss me. No one will ever love you as much as I do.

Dan I know.

Pause.

Alice Why isn't love enough?
I'm the one who leaves.
I'm supposed to leave you.
I'm the one who leaves.

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/7074552/

Thu, 21 Dec 2006 15:21:25 -0800

This is just a riddle. If you think know what it is about, you might want to print it.

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/6857139/

Thu, 07 Dec 2006 18:46:24 -0800

Captain Haddock versus Llama (Tintin et le Temple du Soleil)

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/6017443/

Sat, 14 Oct 2006 06:58:21 -0700

The end of the world

When I finally reached the end of the world, the end of my long journey, I saw land far away in the distance. But I was on a cliff, and could no longer continue. The oceans had ceased. The land had ceased. And now, I would have to look down. But there was no end down. There was only land in the distance. Only in the distance. It was unreachable...

Continues at http://www.helderdarocha.com.br/bloggy/

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/5990317/

Thu, 12 Oct 2006 06:14:19 -0700

Cow Economics (from http://heralias.stumbleupon.com/)

SOCIALISM:
You have 2 cows
and you give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM:
You have 2 cows
the Government takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM:
You have 2 cows
the Government takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM:
You have 2 cows.
The Government takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM:
You have 2 cows
the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away...

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows
But you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION:
You have 5000 cows
None of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You worship them.

A BRITISH CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN IRISH FARMER:
You have two cows.
You claim government subsidies for eight cows.

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/5962915/

Tue, 10 Oct 2006 08:35:01 -0700

How evil are you?

http://helderdarocha.stumbleupon.com/review/5814508/

Fri, 29 Sep 2006 15:27:19 -0700

The site that once hosted this english translation no longer exists. It's a very interesting story told in verse by Pushkin about the forty daughters of Tsar Nikita, who lacked their female parts. Unfortunately the whole poem does not fit here. You can find abridged versions and possibly other translations searching the Web.

The Tale of Tsar Nikita and His Forty Daughters

The following humorous poem was written by the master Russian poet Alexander Pushkin. However, it is not widely known either in Russian, or outside of Russia, since it was not widely published and thus not widely translated. This is due to its somewhat risqu� subject matter, which was frowned upon by the censors of Pushkin's time. The irony is that Pushkin wrote it in a way that subtly mocked censorship in Russia.

Tsar Nikita once reigned widely,
Richly, merrily, and idly,
Did no good or evil thing:
So his realm was flourishing.
He kept clear of toil and bother,
Ate and drank and praised our Father.
With some ladies he had squired
Forty daughters had he sired,
Forty maids with charming faces,
Four times ten celestial graces,
Sweet of temper, full of love.
Ah, what ankles, Heaven above!
Chestnut curls, the heart rejoices,
Eyes - a marvel, wondrous voices,
Minds - enough to lose your mind:
All from head to toe desired
To beguile one's heart and spirit;
There was but a sole demerit.
Oh? What fault was there to find?
None to speak of, never mind.
Or at most the merest tittle.
Still, a flaw (though very little).
How explain it, how disguise
So as not to scandalize
That cantankerous old drip,
Sanctimonious Censorship?
Help me, Muse -your poet begs!
Well - between the lassies' legs...
Stop! Already too explicit,
Too immodest, quite illicit...
Indirection here is best:
Aphrodite's lovely breast,
Lips, and feet set hearts afire,
But the focus of desire,
Dreamed-of goal of sense and touch,
What is that? Oh, nothing much.
Well then, it was this in fact
That the royal lassies lacked.

This unheard-of malformation
Caused dismay and consternation
In each loyal courtly heart,
And much sorrow on the part
Of their Sire and stricken mothers.
From the swaddling-women others
Soon found out what had occurred;
All the nation when it heard
Ah'ed and oh'ed at such an earful,
Gaped and gasped, amazed a fearful;
Some guffawed, but most were leerier:
(This could land you in Siberia!)

Sternly Tsar Nikita summoned
Courtiers, mummies, nannies, "Come and
Hear the stricture I impose:
Any one of you who sows
In my daughters' minds suggestions
Or provokes unseemly questions,
Or so much as dreams to dare
Hint at that which is not there,
Deal in doubtful words and notions,
Or perform improper motions-
Let there be no shred of doubt:
Wives will have their tongues cut out,
Men a member more essential,
Intumescent in potential."

(...)