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Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 06:14:30 -0800

From the page: "The Biggus Dickus scene from Monty Python's Life of Brian. One of my favorite scenes �" although not my absolute favorite �" from one of my most favorite movies ever."

Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 05:36:31 -0800

From the page: "Several years ago, I was driving in downtown Mishawaka, Indiana with my wife, sitting behind a car at a stoplight. The two passengers in the car started hassling a teenager who was walking on the sidewalk, because he held his arms wide and shouted, "you want a piece of me? You want a piece of me?!"

Because he was glaring at those people so intently, he completely missed the lamppost until he ran face first into it."

Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 07:41:44 -0800

From the page: "I'm a big supporter of civil rights and personal liberties. In this country, we're all guaranteed certain inalienable rights, and are allowed certain dignities, even when facing criminal charges.

For example, if you're accused of a crime, you have a right to not have your name dragged through the mud during the investigation. Of course, if you're found guilty, all bets are off. Let the name dragging begin. But until then, people deserve the whole "innocent until proven guilty" benefit of the doubt."

Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 08:31:13 -0800

From the page: "As a self-proclaimed Know-It-All, I am in the enviable position of being able to demonstrate my vast knowledge on a wide array of topics, like how Benjamin Frankton invented the kite, or how Ora and Wilfred Right were the first to fly an airplane across the Pacific Ocean to France.

And people enjoy hearing about these important facts. Oh sure, they may pretend to not be interested. But their eye rolling and shouts of "Would you just shut up?!" are really just good-natured jokes. I think they really appreciate it when I continue to lecture on about important fact that pops into my mind, like how Sir Isaac Newton invented the Apple computer.
"

Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 05:03:50 -0800

From the page: "Animal rights joke organization PETA wants the Wildlife Safari in Oregon to stop using elephants to wash cars.

The group �" which is also widely known for killing pets at its Norfolk, Virginia animal shelter �" thinks the elephant carwash is "a gimmick that does nothing to foster respect for endangered species."

Gimmick? A gimmick?!"

Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 06:03:53 -0800

From the page: "Ever wondered what Peyton Manning shouts at the line of scrimmage? ESPN gives us a look at what goes through the mind of the QB genius."

Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 05:17:45 -0700

From the page: "I recently read a column by fellow humor columnist, Jenny Isenman, about one of her most humiliating experiences as a young girl. Since she doesn't have the global reach I do, I thought I would relate the story for her.

During a skating party in 1984, little Jenny was rolling around the rink during a Girls Skate, leg warmers pulled up over her jeans �" no, that's not the most humiliating part. I know, that surprised me too! �" when she tried to slap hands with an older boy.

Apparently this was a signal. During a Girls Skate, they would slap the outstretched hands of the boys they wanted to Couples Skate with. The boys would stand along the side and stretch out their hands to the girls they wanted to skate with, while the girls hoped the boys they liked had their hands out.

It was an exercise of mutually assured destruction in the self-esteem department."

Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 07:19:25 -0700

From the page: "British police, the enforcement arm of the Nanny State, are now victims of the Nanny State. They have been told not to use certain everyday phrases, because they could cause confusion for some.

An article in the (London) Daily Mail says the Warwickshire Police handbook, Policing Our Communities, says the phrase "Evenin' All" could confuse people from different cultural backgrounds.

"Don't assume those words for the time of day, such as afternoon or evening, have the same meaning," says the handbook."

Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 05:08:40 -0700

From the page: "Not only are the bureaucrats stupid in England, it appears the landscaping people are not much better off. At least that's what we're led to believe.

That's because the staff at Gorstage Cemetery in Weverham, Cheshire told Stanley Brown he could not put more than one bunch of flowers on his wife's grave, because they're obstructions.

Staff told Stanley that the flowers kept the landscapers from cutting the grass, and might cause them to trip."

Erik Deckers Laughing Stalk Blog

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 11:58:25 -0700

From the page: "If you've ever seen any of the Disney/Pixar movies, you've seen the intro with the lamp that just stomps the bejeezus out of the letter 'I' in Pixar.

But do you know what really happened?"