StumbleUpon | bobzero's blog posts

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/32411369/

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 12:31:19 -0700

Bobzero is a 58 year old single guy from Euless, Texas, USA.

Spare Parts
We Barge out of the womb with two of them eyes,ears, arms,hands,legs,feet Only one heart.Not a good plan, God should know we need at least a dozen. a baker's dozen of hearts. they break like Easter eggs. hidden in the grass stepped on and smashed My own heart is patched bandaged,taped,barely the same shape it was when it beat fast for you.
Author: Trish Dugger,

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/31701050/

Sat, 04 Apr 2009 15:45:09 -0700

http://www.picvi.com/2009/04/04/red-bull-festival/

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/31292008/

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 23:42:49 -0700

If your not laughing at this you might want to check your pulse to see if your still alive.....
Click Here!

Subject: Subject: Walmart Diagnostic Center

One
Day, in line at the company cafeteria, Bob says to Mike
behind him, 'My
elbow hurts like the dickens!! I guess I'd better see a
doctor.'

'Listen, you don't have to spend that kind
of money,' Mike replies.

'There's a diagnostic
computer down at Wal-Mart .
Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you
what's wrong and what to do about it.

It takes ten
seconds and costs $10 - A lot cheaper than a
doctor.'

So, Bob deposits a urine sample in a small
jar and takes it to Wal-Mart.

He deposits $10, and
the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He
pours the sample into the slot and
waits.

10
seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
'You have
tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and
Epsom salts found on aisle 2. Avoid heavy activity. It will
improve in 2 weeks. Thank you for shopping @
Wal-Mart.'

That evening, while thinking how amazing
this new technology was, Bob began wondering if the computer
could be fooled.

He mixed some tap water, a stool
sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and
daughter, and a sp*rm
sample for good measure.

Bob hurries back to
Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. H e deposits $10,
pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

The
computer prints the following:

1.
Your tap water is too hard. Get a water
softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm..
Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your
daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your
wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a
lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your
elbow will never get better!

Thank
you for shopping @ Wal-Mart

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/29252918/

Tue, 13 Jan 2009 15:59:57 -0800

Self Portrait

My friend, leave before you fall into my trap
My friend, I'm not what I pretend to be
My friend, I'll only scar you
My friend, you chose the wrong friend to befriend

My friend, I backstab all who trust me
My friend, I lie to all who speak so fondly of my deeds
My friend, I'll bring nothing more than trouble to your doorstep
My friend, I'll never be there when you call

My friend, I'm addicted to this way of life
My friend, I only care for things that add to my pathetic ruin
My friend, I don't care for anybody but myself
My friend, I'm what your mother said a devil might turn out to be

My friend, I'm not proud of all of this
My friend, I'm simply honest and indiscreet
My friend, I'm losing but I'm happy and relaxed
My friend, I think you should stick around for another night and try your luck

Dmitriy Kokarev

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/28811395/

Mon, 29 Dec 2008 11:29:23 -0800

How Many Butts are in this Butt? since she dropped out of Jenny Craig?

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/28798712/

Sun, 28 Dec 2008 22:54:33 -0800

Eagles beat Cowboys to make playoffs
PA SportsTicker
Published: Monday, December 29, 2008

Donovan McNabb Donovan McNabb Getty Images
Story Tools

Donovan McNabb threw two touchdown passes and ran for another as the Philadelphia Eagles scored 41 unanswered points to secure the final playoff spot in the NFC and end the Dallas Cowboys' season with a 44-6 victory at Lincoln Financial Field.

Philadelphia seized control as Dallas eventually unraveled, committing five turnovers, including four fumbles. Two of the fumbles were returned for touchdowns in the third quarter - one for 73 yards by Chris Clemons and a 96-yarder by Joselio Hanson.

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/28739480/

Fri, 26 Dec 2008 11:20:20 -0800

Joe Frazier vs. Mohammed Ali at Madison Square Garden.
Location: New York, NY, US
Date taken: March 08, 1971
Photographer: John Shearer

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/26862361/

Sun, 26 Oct 2008 18:24:40 -0700

Brought To You By Favorite Sex Toys i did WAY Better than i presumed!

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/26252369/

Wed, 08 Oct 2008 14:03:05 -0700

And That's When the Fight Started

Category: Marriage

I heard my wife crying in the bathroom. "Honey? What's wrong" I asked.

"Oh, Bob! Just look at me: I'm getting so old! I have more gray in my hair than blonde, I have varicose veins on both of my legs, and I'm just fat and wrinkled all over! I really need someone to say something positive about me right now!"

I looked deeply into her eyes and said softly: "Your vision's real good, honey. That's something, isn't it?"

And that's when the fight started....

- - -

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive.

So I took her to a gas station.

And that's when the fight started....

- - -

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, "Do you know her?"

"Yes," I sighed, "She was my senior year girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since."

"My God!" says my wife. "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"

And that's when the fight started....

- - -

I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"

It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.

So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"

And that's when the fight started....

- - -

My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"

"No," she answered.

I then said, "Is that your final answer?"

She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."

So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

And that's when the fight started....

Posted October 6, 2008 8:00 AM

http://bobzero.stumbleupon.com/review/26219658/

Tue, 07 Oct 2008 16:40:12 -0700