StumbleUpon | ActionJeans's blog posts

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/32778109/

Wed, 13 May 2009 04:16:36 -0700

This is not a review of random internet whimsy as per usual. Apparently I have the option to just write things if I want, with no video of some dude setting his balls on fire to follow, or any such bullhonky. Once you are done reading, this interaction is over and we call it a day. I am told this is called "blogging" and I'm pretty sure I just invented it. The next sentence is called a "segue".

Sloganing is the cure for what ails, so here goes:

Action Jeans: Synonymous with something that means the same thing.

Action Jeans? Don't mind if I motherfucking do.

Action Jeans: Two great words that go great together, unless you want to say something else that doesn't mean "Action Jeans".

Action Jeans: Why not stumble some shit today? I don't know, that's why.

You could say these Jeans are made of Action, but you would be wrong. Jeaning is just what Action likes to do.

Action Jeans: Voted second favorite thing in a poll made up exclusively of heroin addicts.

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/26146936/

Sun, 05 Oct 2008 17:12:56 -0700

I finally saw The Dark Knight. While I must admit Heath Ledger's last performance rocked my face right off, am I the only one who was annoyed by Christian Bale's "Batman voice"? Holy shit, it took me right out of the movie every time he opened his mouth in-costume.

Also, what was Bruce Wayne's justification for handing over control of the all-knowing cell-phone sonar computer thingie to Morgan Freeman? "Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely"... unless, of course, you're a magical negro.

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/25639052/

Sun, 21 Sep 2008 07:45:34 -0700

What the fuck is a "Barrister", and why does everyone in Nigeria think that calling themselves one entitles them access to my bank account information?

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/24695919/

Sun, 24 Aug 2008 07:44:52 -0700

Yeah, so I had all these awesome ideas about taking Johnnyuma's hat on a tour of San Antonio, getting pictures wearing it in front of the important landmarks (all the cool spots the tourists don't know about), etc.... but once again, life gets in the way of all the stuff I actually want to do.

As a result, I ended up keeping the hat longer than I meant to, slowing its mission of spreading head-bourne vermin to new and distant lands. I apologize. Rest assured, the hat will resume its journey as of Monday, safely in the hands of the U.S. postal service and on its way to Rrrick, where he will surely make better use of his time with the hat than I have.

To make up for it, here's some gratuitously cute pictures of my infant daughter wearing the shit out of a pork-pie hat:

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/17374539/

Wed, 13 Feb 2008 06:58:03 -0800

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/16475409/

Tue, 22 Jan 2008 09:56:53 -0800

Well, here's the awesome dinosaur PJs that Weirding was kind enough to buy for Jack's Christmas present:

Yes, they are super cool, but why am I making a post about them? Well, the other day I was doing laundry, and I got a closer look at them:

Holy Shit!

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/15311590/

Sun, 16 Dec 2007 15:33:44 -0800

So I haven't been posting for awhile, or been online much at all. Here's the reason (as friends of my wife Amyss probably already know):

My daughter, Ella.

I've received quite a few pms from well wishers, and I just want to make a post saying thanks, and apologizing for not responding to them sooner. It's been a hectic first week, and I've been pretty busy.

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/11735851/

Fri, 10 Aug 2007 20:51:45 -0700

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/8993929/

Thu, 05 Apr 2007 22:57:22 -0700

Holy shit, it's the double-dong from GTA: San Andreas!

See?

http://ActionJeans.stumbleupon.com/review/8880305/

Sat, 31 Mar 2007 07:33:34 -0700

Don't be an insensitive asshole. Make sure you know every illness that random people on the street could possibly suffer from, and be prepared to administer prompt medical treatment in any situation. Unless they look ugly, then just go about your business.

But whatever you do, make sure they don't click on the picture above.